It's My Shell of a Life
by Cipher Admin Gengar
Summary: Bowser's Awfully grumpy... now you'll find out why!


This is just some random, funny fic that came to me in a brilliant vision at Boy

Scouts. Please R&R.

Shell life

Insane asylum:

Bowser: Oh, it's my turn to tell my feelings? Well, okay, if you say so. I have

two things to say. First, WHY IS THIS STORY ARCHIVED IN "MARIO"?

THIS IS SO RETARTED! MY AUTHOR IS AN IDIOT! THERE SHOULD

BE A SEPRETE CATEGORY FOR BOWSER! I MEAN, AREN'T I

GREAT? AREN'T I!

Second, MARIO IS THE SECOND BIGGEST RETARD NEXT TO

MY AUTHOR! I mean, one day, I was strolling down mushroom bridge, and

I spot this hot chick called Peach, and I start to hit on her. I tell her that I am

the king of all Koopas, and she says that she wants to come to my castle.

So, when I take her to my castle, she starts to strip and starts giving my son

STRANGE IDEAS. So, I lock her up in a cage, and she starts yelling, Mario,

Mario, come save me! And then this moronic plumber beats up all my minions,

and he comes to my castle, and I'm all like, whoa, this is all a big

misunderstanding. But he beats me up anyway!

Mario pisses me off, bigtime. I mean, when Luigi and Peach are making out in

the closet, he doesn't get mad at all. When Peach and Daisy are making out in

the close, he might do inappropriate things to both, but he doesn't get mad!

But when I make out with Peach in the closet, he's all like, oh no you didn't!

and starts beating me up!

Luigi isn't any better. I mean, King Boo locks me up in a stupid painting, and

when Luigi tries to save Mario (Luigi must be a big fag, why would anyone

want to save him? He must be gay.) King Boo possesses me and lets me get

beat up while he is unharmed. Then Luigi chops my head off, and King Boo

runs away! Can you believe it? And then he just leaves my body there and saves

his brother. I'm like, hey, little help over here. But NO! No one has common

courtesy anymore. They could at least give me a funeral.

Mario is also a CHILD MOLESTER! I mean, I take a vacation with my son to

isle delfino, we swim in the hot tub, drink some beer, and enslave the Pinnas.

Hey, there just chubby morons who can only make good beer.

Mmmmm…..Beer…Anyway, Mario comes up the volcano and is all mad,

because he _thinks_ I kidnapped Peach. FYI! I don't want her! She is a crazed

stripper who likes to do inappropriate things! Then Mario starts beating

up my son, and, I have every legal right to this, I start attacking him with my

fireballs. Then he kills me and kidnaps my son!

So, after that mishap, I decide to take my son go-karting. Big Mistake. Mario

and Luigi hit my kart with a fire-ball, and when I'm about to kill him with a

shell, Peach and Daisy steal it and throw it back at me! Then, Baby Mario and

Baby Luigi kill me with a chain chomp! Then, even my homies Wario and

Waluigi hit me with a bomb! Totally terrorist! Then DK and Diddy make me

slip on a DN banana! Then, my servent Peaty Piranah teams up with that

idiot King Boo, and they run me over with every item imaginable!

Then some creep called Master Hand kidnaps me, and puts me in this fighting

game. I think, cool, I get to kill Mario. But no! He puts me against a level 9

Captain Falcon, who again, beats the crap out of me! So, after that, before I

even get to put one ace bandage on, Master Hand puts me against some copy

of myself called Giga Bowser, who starts to beat the crap out of me! Then the

crowd starts chanting "Giga Bowser! Giga Bowser!" And I'm all like, what the

heck? I'm the real Bowser! Cheer for me! And then the crowd starts throwing

invincible stars at Giga, and he does a Bowser Bomb (MY MOVE) and, since

he is as fat as the whole dang Final Destination stage, and he sends me to the

emergency room!

I have something else to say. Mario was in insane case even when he was a

baby! My main koopa, Kamek, is an excellent babysitter, and he was taking

care of baby Luigi, and he lost baby Mario. Then the Yoshi's found him, and

taught him the ways of evil! Then a Yoshi comes to my house, and beats up me,

a harmless, undefended child!

Then, one time, some idiot kidnapped me and brought me to dinosaur land.

Then I meet these people who say they are my kids. ANOTHER FYI: My only

son is Bowser Jr. So these "Kids" of mine all die, and Mario goes on another of

his rants, and again, kills me!

Kamek: Okay, Bowser, time to go back to reality. Now, it's ni-ni

time! (Kamek pulls out syringe)

Bowser: Snore….

and now you know, why Bowser hates Mario so much! Thank you! REVIEW

ME, or Bowser will kill you! (as long as you are not a level ning c. falcon)


End file.
